Loss: A child no more

Writing 101_ Serially Lost

She had just spent one hour forty five minutes resuscitating a baby….and the baby was finally stable. On a ventilator but still stable. Her joy was overwhelming. As a team they gave each other hi fives …they had saved yet another life and It repaid all the struggles of living high on adrenaline and all those hours on bent …searching for patent IV lines.

She degloved and walked away calmly. Her shift was over,she could go lie down. As she walked past she passed an incubator of a baby who three days earlier had been the recipient of her endeavours to resuscitate. The baby, a lovely girl, day seven of life looked calm; stable. She took her T-sheet scanned over her medicine. Feeds would be introduced the following day. She smiled …the baby would be fine.

As she walked away; many thoughts flooded her mind.

She cringed as she saw a little girl ..about seven years of age being led to a dirty river by an enraged woman. The girl was crying screaming….saying how sorry she was. The lady was hot on her step …ranting clearly angry at something, at the edge of the bridge  .She saw the lady hold the young girl firmly, like she was trying to gain momentum . She tried running to the two….suddenly realising the intent ..and then just as soon as she was almost, the lady jerked and yanked the young girl towards her and turned direction and started walking….still clearly angry. But something had changed and just as suddenly as she had seen them …..they disappeared…As if part of the mist.

She shook her head. Clearly she had spent a bit too much time in the wards. She needed to rest. She walked on knowing she was nearing her car. She loved that car! A Mercedes CLS 550, her own baby 🙂
Another 40 minutes and she knew she would be home showered and with a hot cocoa in hand. She let her mind wander to that.

As she drove off she could see a little girl waving from her rear view mirror. She waved back almost sure it was her patient but wondering what the child was doing alone at 8pm. From a far she saw the caretaker slapping the hand of the girl. She wondered why the caretaker had not just led the child away but figured parenting skills were different. Spare the rod spoil the child yes?

Closer home she saw many children on the streets (street urchins) but one family in particular captured her eyes. A little boy looking on to her older sister as she collected what seemed to be peanuts from the floor. As she looked on wondering at this strange behaviour she saw the sister kicked to the ground by an older woman and peanuts would fall from her hands and she would be ordered to pick and consume them all.
The woman was shouting obscenities at the child calling her foolish and stupid!

“Unamwaga njungu naunajua ni zakuuza kwa nini?? Kula yote! ”

Why are you pouring peanuts knowing well they are for sale ? Eat all of them!

Followed by another kick. The sister was shouting that it was an accident yet still struggling to eat in a place surrounded by flies and dirt. The little boy crying tried reaching out to the sister but was violently taken and put on the woman’s back. The sister looking at them in fear and even from so far away she could see the young girl was visibly trembling.

It was heart breaking. It tore up her heart. She wondered if to stop the car and slap the woman or just run her over …but remembered hers was to save life. She marked the children’s faces and that of the woman. Her heart filled with venom and vowed to return during the day with authorities and to find a suitable home for the children.

Her drive had taken longer than usual …but her mind was racing.

She would get to the bottom of all that she had seen…She remembered her small little girl …the 7 day old one in the nursery. And today’s boy. The one the team and her had so bravely saved. There was hope yet.